There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
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