3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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