I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
