I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Randomize
