Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
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