Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Randomize
