taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
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