Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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