thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
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