Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (415): View more from California

  I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?

  (510): View more from California

  I hope so

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (415): I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die? (510): I hope so http://tfl.nu/tt2l
  Replies (41) Good night (1981) Bad night (5031)
• Favorite

  (440): View more from Ohio

  oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (440): oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet. http://tfl.nu/d9ji
  Replies (18) Good night (5968) Bad night (493) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (703): nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase http://tfl.nu/yg43
  Replies (11) Good night (4273) Bad night (1126) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (720): View more from Colorado

  I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (720): I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower. http://tfl.nu/yzkb
  Replies (44) Good night (11981) Bad night (860) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (843): View more from South Carolina

  when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (843): when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home. http://tfl.nu/096s
  Replies (33) Good night (12095) Bad night (1204)
• Favorite

  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (774): Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id? http://tfl.nu/53ps
  Replies (6) Good night (3475) Bad night (729) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (204): View more from Manitoba

  Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (204): Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself http://tfl.nu/03x0
  Replies (9) Good night (958) Bad night (3577) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (609): why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures? http://tfl.nu/ty0v
  Replies (6) Good night (2016) Bad night (938) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (414): He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after. http://tfl.nu/s41l
  Replies (8) Good night (3491) Bad night (674) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (910): View more from North Carolina

  He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (910): He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today. http://tfl.nu/xbxf
  Replies (5) Good night (1011) Bad night (1663) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (307): View more from Wyoming

  I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (307): I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head. http://tfl.nu/1su5
  Replies (2) Good night (888) Bad night (857) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (937): View more from Ohio

  How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (937): How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold. http://tfl.nu/0xc1
  Replies (14) Good night (2629) Bad night (531) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (843): View more from South Carolina

  dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..

  (1-843): View more from South Carolina

  successful birthday. 2012 rules

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (843): dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance.. (1-843): successful birthday. 2012 rules http://tfl.nu/1z4y
  Replies (1) Good night (489) Bad night (969)
• Favorite

  (334): View more from Alabama

  OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (334): OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS http://tfl.nu/wcsc
  Replies (4) Good night (685) Bad night (132) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (479): View more from Arkansas

  I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (479): I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower... http://tfl.nu/hy7a
  Replies (1) Good night (252) Bad night (482) Order T-Shirt

Randomize