I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
he laminated a picture of his dick.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Randomize
