it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
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