But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
I have post one night stand depression
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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