both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
