bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize
