oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
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