no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
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