just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Randomize
