How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
Randomize