Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Randomize