Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
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