yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Randomize