Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
Impromptu road trip to New Orleans for four days of Mardi Gras. I'll probably be alive and back for Valentine's Day plans, probably won't stick my dick in some random either-might be using my free pass you cheating asshat. Love you. Expect random texts & probably a drunk dial or twelve. You did this to yourself. You're not invited so don't bother. Have fun at work.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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