I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
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