she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
Randomize
