We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
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