Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
