i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
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