she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Randomize
