She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Alive.
So much puke
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
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