good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Randomize
