No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
last night I used snow as a chaser
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