For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
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Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
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I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
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