He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize
