Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
I got chris browned last night
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
