So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
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