...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
She's the barista slut.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
