she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
