Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
Randomize
