He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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