Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
Randomize