I hate all girls vehemently.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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