And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
Randomize
