maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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