And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Randomize
