my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
Randomize
