Nicole vs. Life
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
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