By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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