No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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