i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
cat food counts as protein by the way
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
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