ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
Randomize
